the epic for Significant Other

you don't find many people these days who have the heart of gold.
you don't find many people these days that see the good things people do.
rather, they choose to only see the bad things that happen around them.
the best kind of people are the ones that see past your faults.
the ones that accepts you for who you are no matter how bad your past has been.
people worth treasuring are the ones that are willing to sacrifice everything for another despite their inconveniences.
i've found mine. the other half.
the one who is willing to tolerate all my faults, all the wrong that i've done.
the one willing to forgive even after all the bad things i've ever said and did.
the one who is willing to settle all my worldly debts when i desperately needed it.
the one who reaches out to put me on the correct path each time i stray away. the one who is still by my side after all the ups and especially downs in life.

sometimes people make stupid decisions that affects the closest people without even knowing it.
people can be stupid that way. they never think it through, the decisions that they make.
you can't blame others for something that you've mucked up on your own, can you?
i guess everyone has their dark era. i've gone through mine. 
goes to show that alot of improvements are needed, especially the responsibilities to God for the afterlife.

the world is merely just a temporary place before we are granted something much greater.
never stop asking for His forgiveness. unlike the mortal human, God is ever forgiving. al-Ghaffar = maha Pengampun.
oh also, it is hoped that that very someone will get exactly what that person deserves: for being utterly deceiving, greedy and for their betrayal. now and in the afterlife, especially for all the fitnah you've been doing.
every day i'm grateful for what i have. always remember that God knows what's best for you.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

dear Significant Other,
my sweetheart,
my one and only, 

not everyone is perfect. you make mistakes on your journey of life, and maybe with or without intention you hurt people along the way for the decisions that you make.

i'd like to apologize for making the biggest mistake i've ever made so far which resulted in hurting you and the family. true it's my fault for not making use of everything that i've learnt my entire 30 yrs of living, my fault for listening to the wrong set of people, my wrongdoing for not being smart enough to know what's right and what's wrong.

but good people will always emerge and be rewarded by God for your patience and because of this i truly believe you will eventually get what you really want for yourself in life that would make you truly happy, here and in the afterlife. you're intelligent, loyal, way better than anyone i know, an added bonus that you come with a big package, everything that anyone would love to have. i know you deserve someone much better, but if permitted by God i would like to be the one that tries hard every day to make you happy, to make sure that you wake up with a smile on your face every morning and fall asleep with a light heart at night.

i hope that somewhere in your heart you will learn to open your heart and forgive the one person that's closest to you who is also only human and has alot to improve in order to become the better wife for you, or if God permits, to grant you with the wife you truly deserve, be it me or another. and i also pray that you will be the husband and father that your family can always look up to and depend upon.

i look back on the past years and i realize how i've never shown how much appreciation i've had for you, for all the things that you've done and sacrificed in order to keep the whole family together, to grant them a better life. you've been nothing but loyal, i've been nothing but a jerk who doesn't know how to express the emotions you're longing for. i'm sorry it had to take a mistake to really open up my eyes. every day i'm learning to be grateful for everything that i have in my life, one day at a time.

i believe that the blessing of a child is a sign of blessing from above, a piece of encouragement that tells you that you still have the opportunity to seek His forgiveness, an opportunity to make things right so as long as you're sincere and stay away from all the negativeness in life. there are so many people out there who are never happy at other people's success so they try to do everything in their power to destroy you. insyallah i believe that eventually after time everything will be repaired, slowly if not surely. you just have to have faith and believe.

wishing you a happy birthday my love, may you always be blessed with happiness, may you learn to love more and give more, may God recognize you for your utter patience and reward you with your hearts' desires.

from 1981 to many more years of love and life.

love,

your humble wife.

note: the excerpt below is taken from Asma's blog. her entries are always meaningful in every way.

'Except those who repent and believe (in Islamic Monotheism), and do righteous deeds; for those, Allah will change their sins into good deeds, and Allah is Oft-forgiving, Most Merciful.'
(Surah Al-Furqan: 70)